My friend Don overheard this in the pub the other night, so it may only be a rumour...
'Apparently in an attempt to brand his party more distinctly, John Key is launching a private members bill allowing employers to smack workers, using "reasonable force". As in, for example, "a few slaps on the buttocks for chronic absenteeism", or " a swift clip round the ear for clocking another employee's card". "That's not as hurtful as instant dismissal", argues Key " We think the occasional loving smack will help make some work sites a lot more family friendly. [Read more below]
There is, of course, tradition behind this proposed legislation. Remember, Captain Cook used to dust down his able seamen with a whip now and again and where would we be today without him?"
ACT dismissed the "reasonable force "provision as "wissy stuff that restricts employers freedom" "What on earth is wrong with a good punch in the nose for gross misconduct?" Rodney Hide asked.
The Employers Federation welcomed the bill, although stressing that smacking would have to be as well as, not instead of current disciplinary procedures.
Helen Clark saw "some possibility" of room for worker smacking in cases of illegal political striking, but stressed that her ERA law was "already one of the most anti strike laws in the Western world".
The Maori party said smacking might be better used to encourage the unemployed to work for the dole.
Greens were divided, some being anti smack full stop and others seeing some case for "New Zealand employers, but not foreign ones" to smack.
New Zealand First wanted all foreign workers to be smacked as a matter of course before being sent back to where they came from.
The CTU was still investigating international labour law on the issue, but said in the interim some very light smacking could be done with union consultation.
The PSA put an amendment that would stipulate joint supervisor/delegate smacking. There was some unconfirmed union speculation about a Clean Smack campaign, trading off unrestricted worker floggings for increased union density.
ALF was 100% against the bill, on the grounds that any increased licence to
smack humans might spread to smacking of animals.
As I said, this all might only be a rumour, but you never know - smacking workers doesn't sound much sillier than smacking children.'
